Postpartum

Okay. It's time to talk about postpartum all the things. You should know by now that I'm a sucker for a good list. In keeping with tradition, and because it's my all time favorite way to plan everything, here's another. (Side note, the list rules my life, and sometimes I write things on the list just so I can have the satisfaction of crossing it off. "wake up in the morning" check. Does anyone else do that? No?)

Postpartum Body
My body will never be the same. It just will not. And because of the things I have been able to experience through my body, I don't think I ever want it to. It will never be the same, but I think it will forever be stronger and better for the miracle of motherhood.

I will always have faint marks to tell the story of my skin stretching So. Much. I might have tiny sprouts of hair regrowth on my head for at least ten years. Maybe lower back pain indefinitely, most likely a better sense of the miracle of human life forever, and why do I feel like I have premature arthritis now?

Postpartum Schedule
Um. Is this a thing? I don't think so...Unless it's: grab snatches of sleep when and however you can, take less showers even though you always smell like baby something (spit, food, poop, etc.), kiss baby cheeks at least 200 times everyday, and always feel tired. Also it takes about 17 times longer to get ready to leave with a baby so you will probably always be late. Yes. That is the schedule.

Postpartum Depression
This IS a thing. And when your doctor prescribes an anti-depressant, it makes you more depressed. Taking it is also very depressing. It seems counterproductive until that depressing pill starts to mute your world. Then the moods aren't so drastic, but you also feel like you should be feeling more of something. Anything. There is a spattering of not so good days, and more really bad days but that perfect baby and a husband who loves your flaws into non-existence can usually put a smile on your face.

Overall, after baby, the time dubbed postpartum, has been incredibly hard. It's ironic too, because that baby boy fills me with so much purpose. His arrival has been so monumental that I sometimes feel like he has aligned the universe and put me right where I belong. This wife-slash-mom gig is seriously the greatest.